IT’S IMPORTANT HOW WE SPEAK

It is not only important what we say and to whom we say it, but how we say it. As a matter of fact, we may say something very beneficial, and we may say it to the people who need to hear it, but they may never want to hear it because of the way that we say it. When we speak, the words that we chose are important, and so is the intonation that we use, the level of volume in which we speak, and the body language that we use. If we point our fingers at someone in an accusing way, while we are speaking to them, or raise our voice, or speak in a harsh tone, it doesn’t matter what we are saying, because no one will want to listen to what we are saying, no matter how truthful it may be.

WE SHOULD SPEAK THE TRUTH IN A LOVING WAY

We must always speak the truth, but we must speak it in a loving way. The truth without love can be very brutal. We need to learn to be balanced and speak the truth in love – always! People are much more open to receiving the truth, even if it hurts, if they know that the one giving it is motivated by love and has their best interest in mind. Love is patient, kind, never rude or self-seeking. It’s good for us to be attentive to what’s going on inside of us and to know the motives behind our words.

WE SHOULD SPEAK GRACIOUSLY WITH EACH OTHER

If we listen very carefully as we walk through a day’s tasks, we might hear people all around us speaking harshly and rudely to each other. We might hear people raising their voices in anger, or we might notice that often the intonation in people’s voices as they converse is sharp or cutting. It takes a lot of attentiveness on our part to not get caught up in this kind of speech. It may be that we have grown up our whole life around people who talk this way to each other, and it might be very difficult for us to break the habit of talking this way. However, it is still important for us to be committed to relearning and growing to become very gracious in our speech. Grace always sees the best in others and reaches out to them in kindness, even when they don’t deserve it. When we converse and communicate with each other, we should do it in a gracious way, always endeavoring to show love to those with whom we are conversing. Gracious speech can win over the hearts of people and enable us to build relationships and even obtain favor with people in places of authority.

WE SHOULD SPEAK WITH OTHERS WITH GENTLENESS

As we listen to those around us speaking, it often seems rude and frank and unloving. Culturally, men often think that speaking harsh is manly. Gentleness is not normally thought of as a manly trait. In reality, it should be displayed by both men and women. When people disagree about things, they often “discuss” their beliefs “loudly”. They may also become strong, pushy, and argumentative. This is not gentleness. Harsh words create more anger in people, whereas gentleness calms people down and helps to diminish their anger. Men often think that gentleness is a sign of weakness, but in reality, gentleness is a powerful and effective character trait that can attract people and win them over. We need to listen to how we speak, evaluate our speech, and be willing to change our way of speaking. We may even need some outside help to work on it, and. Since it took a lifetime to learn our poor communication habits, it will take time, effort and prayer to change. Kind speech and healthy communication habits will cause others to listen, respect, and love us more, and even open them up to our advice. I am writing this because I know that it’s time for me to work on my own communication in 2010. How about you? Is there room for improvement in how you communicate? What do you plan to do about it?

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